Would drivers obey the speed limit for fun?

By Aaron Naparstek | Published: October 5, 2010


Speed camera lottery via @FelixSalmon.

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Stalled Sprawl, Mystery Attack Ads and Osama Calls for Action on Climate Change

By Aaron Naparstek | Published: October 4, 2010

Did you ever want to live inside a transistor radio? Check out Alan Taylor’s striking aerial photos of stalled sprawl projects in Southwest Florida at Boston.com’s The Big Picture. via the NRDC’s Kaid Benfield.

The creepy, chilling outcome of the Supreme Court’s Citizens United decision: Oregon Democrat Peter DeFazio tries to figure out who is behind sophisticated and mysterious political attack ads. (All Things Considered)

This probably doesn’t help to move things along in the U.S. Senate: Osama bin Laden calls for action on climate change. (Reuters)

Automobile dependence is a crushing financial burden for America’s poor and increasingly unsustainable for the middle class. (The Lutz Sisters)

I’m kind of sorry I’m not in San Francisco attending “the largest interdisciplinary gathering of individuals and institutions at the intersection of money and meaning.” (SOCAP10)

Here’s the best video yet of the Park Slope Tornado, filmed at the intersection of 7th Avenue and 9th Street where the plate glass windows of the Brooklyn Industries store shattered. (YouTube)

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Beware the Park Slope Hooker Dog Thief

By Aaron Naparstek | Published: September 30, 2010

Click to enlarge the Park Slope Hooker Dog Thief.

I’m generally a big fan of the Park Slope Food Coop. The fresh produce and low prices can’t be beat. It’s a great community center and I always run in to friends and colleagues when I’m shopping and working there. The Coop provides a steady customer base for a slew of outstanding food producers around New York City while taking dollars out of the industrial food system. And in this age of market hegemony the Coop shows that when done right, socialism can really work. The Coop grossed nearly $40 million last year and, by some measures, is now substantially more profitable and efficient than capitalist counterparts like Trader Joes and Whole Foods, according to Fortune Magazine. Thanks to the Park Slope Food Coop, the creeping threat of socialist grocery shopping is growing. There are six other food coops in various stages of formation throughout Brooklyn right now. Take that, Glenn Beck.

But, man, if we’re being honest about it, let’s acknowledge that Park Slope-style socialism can also be a pain in the ass. If you miss a shift or two you’re doomed. My Food Coop membership status is in a nearly constant state of “alert” or “suspension” and I seem to spend most of the year digging out, paying back my debt to society with extra work shifts.

And there was that one time last year when the woman checking out my groceries, a volunteer member-owner like myself and everyone else who shops at the Coop, made two full-fledged business phone calls while very slowly and distractedly running my items through the bar code scanner. When I begged her to stop dialing and hold off on her third phone call until after she’d finished checking me out she snapped back something like, “Look, man, I work for Impoverished New Yorkers Seeking Justice. And this phone call, is a lot more important than that.” She pointed scornfully at my grass-fed organic hamburger meat. You might get some gum-snapping attitude at the Key Food but the checkout lady is never under the illusion that she’s doing you a big favor.

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Tea Party TV

By Aaron Naparstek | Published: September 27, 2010

It’s football season and that means it’s the only time of year that I’m watching the same television programming as guys who like Sarah Palin. If you’ve got 180 seconds to kill and you want a concise, entertaining glimpse at the American collective unconscious, here were the three most outstanding ads of the day…

Dodge Challenger Freedom:
Perhaps you are unaware of this piece of American history. Just a few years after the original Boston Tea Party, George Washington led his Continental Army into battle against the British Red Coats on a winter day somewhere near Lake Tahoe. The snobby, elitist looks were wiped right off the British officers’ faces as they saw the Americans charging over the hill with their 475 horsepower, 6.4 liter HEMI’s, rocking 11 miles per gallon.

Bo and Luke Duke drove a Dodge Challenger too, just like George Washington. They called it The General Lee because, you know, General Robert E. Lee was all about freedom — unless you happened to be the property of a Southern plantation owner. Electric cars? High speed rail? Let the Chinese figure out that shit. Because “Here’s a coupla things America got right: Cars and freedom.” Yes, they actually came right out and said it. The only way this ad could be more brilliant is if it’s airing during NBC’s new show, “Outsourced.” Incidentally, Chrysler is now owned by Italians. Watch…


Burger King Breakfast March:
A militia of white men in blue-collar work uniforms (and one black dude in a suit) fall into formation and march forth from their David Brooks-approved McMansions accompanied by fife and drum. Eyes forward, resolute, they are hardly even distracted as they pass the ultimate dream MILF watering her front lawn. The same can’t be said for the Lycra-clad cyclist riding on the sidewalk in the opposite direction of the marchers. He crashes into a tricycle and flips over his handle bars. Asshole.

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Planet Albany: Return of the Cuomo

By Aaron Naparstek | Published: September 19, 2010

Separated at birth? Carl Paladino and Emperor Palpatine.

Carl Paladino: Ah, yes. A liberal, downstate, union-backed gubernatorial campaign, much like your father’s. By now you must know that your father can never be returned to the guvernor’s mansion [sic]. So will it be with you.

Paladino:  I’m looking forward to completing this campane [sic]. In time you will call me guvernor [sic].

Andrew Cuomo: You’re gravely mistaken. And your spelling is atrocious.

Paladino: Oh no, my young Jedi. You will find that it is you who are mistaken, about a great many things.

Paladino: Come, boy, see for yourself. From here, you will witness the final dustruction [sic] of the Working Families Party and the end of your insignificant campaign.

[Andrew's eyes go to his light saber]

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